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Words by Woody
By Woody Daniels

If our troops can't stay the course at a UofL game, how can we expect them to do the same in Iraq?

Mission aborted. Chalk another one up for an early exit strategy. If you needed any more proof that it’s time our troops catch a one-way flight from Iraq back to the U.S., you saw it last Friday night when Louisville faced Utah at Papa John’s Cardinal Stadium. With about 5:30 left in the fourth quarter on Military Day, our brave U.S. Americans made a bold move: they left. Couldn’t take it anymore. See ya later. Risky? Sure. But what happened next likely had Nancy Pelosi breaking out one of those rare non-plastic surgery-enhanced smile of hers: the 8,000 or so fired-up Cardinal fans left in the stands gave our troops a resounding applause and the proverbial standing O.

Talk to the troops and they’ll tell you enough was enough. Too many stalled offensive drives, too little defense on the ground and in the air, and a lack of leadership on the sidelines. Add it all up and it means getting the hell out.

“What’s almost worse than an IED?” asked soldier and Cardinal fan Jake Demshaw, one of 1,500 troops stationed in Fort Knox who attended the game. “Seeing a bunch of terrible football players running all over and through your defense, that’s what. I never thought I’d see anything as disturbing as the Cards losing two in a row at home to two embarrassing teams.”

Wait a second, Jake. If our troops can’t stay the course at a Louisville football game, how can we expect them to do the same in Iraq? But perhaps more importantly, if our troops are showered with love after an early exit, why shouldn’t they do that in Iraq?

“What you saw at that game is exactly what we want,” Democratic Presidential Candidate Dennis Kucinich said between counting quarters donated towards his robust campaign fund. “The troops left, everyone loved them, and the Cards almost came back. Sounds like a winning combination to me. I expect the same reaction from Iraqis.

“Look, the insurgents weren’t given a chance going into this war. But you know what, they stuck to their game plan and pulled an Appalachian State, pulled a Syracuse, pulled a Stanford, pulled a whatever you want to call it. If I were an Iraqi, I’d thank our troops for their service but tell them it's better off they leave and return home safely.”

Of course, not everyone enjoys the positive momentum that comes with the exit-now bandwagon. Leave it up to Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., who probably could use a little plastic surgery himself, to give us one of his famous blank stares to really get the pro-war juices going again.

“When I saw the troops leave early, I was appalled,” said McConnell, who recently forbid his wife, Elaine Chao, from making any more lead-based toys for their grandchildren. “That was a clear case of cut and run. Sure, UofL improved temporarily, but in the end, they lost. If we leave Iraq right now, there may be some initial stability, but the Iraqis lose in the end. Pure and simple.”

Thanks for clarifying, Mitch. Mission accomplished.

Woody Daniels is a self-proclaimed award-winning writer who enjoys woodworking. He can be reached at woody@thespottedbass.com.



Home > Words by Woody Words by Woody By Woody Daniels If our troops can't stay the course at a UofL game, how can we expect them to do the same in Iraq? Mission aborted. Chalk another one up for an early exit strategy. If you needed any more proof that it’s time our troops catch a one-way flight from Iraq back to the U.S., you saw it last Friday night when Louisville faced Utah at Papa John’s Cardinal Stadium. With about 5:30 left in the fourth quarter on Military Day, our brave U.S. Americans made a bold move: they left. Couldn’t take it anymore. See ya later. Risky? Sure. But what happened next likely had Nancy Pelosi breaking out one of those rare non-plastic surgery-enhanced smile of hers: the 8,000 or so fired-up Cardinal fans left in the stands gave our troops a resounding applause and the proverbial standing O. Talk to the troops and they’ll tell you enough was enough. Too many stalled offensive drives, too little defense on the ground and in the air, and a lack of leadership on the sidelines. Add it all up and it means getting the hell out. “What’s almost worse than an IED?” asked soldier and Cardinal fan Jake Demshaw, one of 1,500 troops stationed in Fort Knox who attended the game. “Seeing a bunch of terrible football players running all over and through your defense, that’s what. I never thought I’d see anything as disturbing as the Cards losing two in a row at home to two embarrassing teams.” Wait a second, Jake. If our troops can’t stay the course at a Louisville football game, how can we expect them to do the same in Iraq? But perhaps more importantly, if our troops are showered with love after an early exit, why shouldn’t they do that in Iraq? “What you saw at that game is exactly what we want,” Democratic Presidential Candidate Dennis Kucinich said between counting quarters donated towards his robust campaign fund. “The troops left, everyone loved them, and the Cards almost came back. Sounds like a winning combination to me. I expect the same reaction from Iraqis. “Look, the insurgents weren’t given a chance going into this war. But you know what, they stuck to their game plan and pulled an Appalachian State, pulled a Syracuse, pulled a Stanford, pulled a whatever you want to call it. If I were an Iraqi, I’d thank our troops for their service but tell them it's better off they leave and return home safely.” Of course, not everyone enjoys the positive momentum that comes with the exit-now bandwagon. Leave it up to Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., who probably could use a little plastic surgery himself, to give us one of his famous blank stares to really get the pro-war juices going again. “When I saw the troops leave early, I was appalled,” said McConnell, who recently forbid his wife, Elaine Chao, from making any more lead-based toys for their grandchildren. “That was a clear case of cut and run. Sure, UofL improved temporarily, but in the end, they lost. If we leave Iraq right now, there may be some initial stability, but the Iraqis lose in the end. Pure and simple.” Thanks for clarifying, Mitch. Mission accomplished. Woody Daniels is a self-proclaimed award-winning writer who enjoys woodworking. He can be reached at woody@thespottedbass.com. Woody's archive Kentucky's youth are still recovering from Breno Giacomini's ugly gesture Unlike predecessors, Barnhart hopes Brooks and Gillispie won’t use UK as steppingstone

Words by Woody By Woody Daniels

If our troops can't stay the course at a UofL game, how can we expect them to do the same in Iraq?

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